The Pucking Files: November 2015

Friday, November 27, 2015

Stuffing the Turkey

The Pilgrims may not have been thinking about hockey when they sat down for the first Thanksgiving, but we are thankful for the great tradition of Thanksgiving morning hockey at the Doug. It brings together people from as diverse cultures as the NAHL, the CCHL and the NCAA. The stands were packed for the holiday showdown. Mike Hayes told us that he stood in line all night in order to see the event. "I'm thankful to be able to get a ticket to this game", Hayes said. "The pace of the game is phenomenal and the skill level is through the roof", he explained. "The Thanksgiving morning game is like getting right to the dessert before the main course", said Tom "Philby" Philbrick. Tom skated on the All-Philby line which was a force all game long. Todd Philbrick cooked his famous chicken wings in the Doug parking lot. Kurt "Kaiser" Gillies was equal to the task with his barbeque ribs. By the time the players returned home, the Detroit Lions had already scored three touchdowns.
Black Friday is the day that all the new Black Ice apparel goes on sale. This year Black Ice apparel features a new line of lingerie. It's sure to be a big seller.

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

Loco Logo

The Black Ice Committee has selected two logos from thousands of entries from the contest to redesign the 1883 Black Ice Pond Hockey logo. "We've looked at so many great designs, but after careful consideration, we have narrowed it down to just two designs", said Chris "Brownie" Brown. "Ironically, BOTH designs that were chosen were submitted by the same person. We were unaware who authored the designs until after they were chosen. It just goes to show what great design sense this person has", he added. Both designs were submitted by Herb Danis of Concord, NH. One designs places a burning ninja cat in front of the bridge and the other design features two giant size knobs with faces on them. "I felt like we needed something that speaks not only to hockey enthusiast, but to "pussiasts (cat lovers) too. For my other design, I was addressing the issue of knobs. We all know one or two, so why not embrace it?", said Danis. "It's pure genius!", exclaimed Samantha Cumworth, the chairman of the Currier Museum. "Now comes the really difficult decision of which one of the designs to choose", said Tom "Painch" Painchaud, a member of the Black Ice Committee. The Black Ice Committee plans to announce the winner on New Year's Day during the Winter Classic. In the meantime, Herb Danis is already counting the $50,000 prize money that he is sure to win. "I plan on donating half of the money to "Pussy Galore" a charity dedicated to rescuing cats. It is a charity that I really believe in", explained Herb.
In other news, Green continues to show it's dominance in the NAHL by getting off to it's best start in franchise history. Blue has a lot of ground to make up if it has any chance of making the playoffs. They are off to their worst start in franchise history. Magenta is firmly entrenched in second place, while Chrome and Teal are tied for third.
In the CCHL attendance is down by 38% from last season while fighting majors are up by 73% compared to last season. Former league scoring champion Tim "The Timinator" Walsh is sidelined for a month with a broken hand that he suffered in a fight last week. CCHL commissioner Jeff "Hurricane" Kane is on the hot seat. Many are calling for Phil "Commish" Stewart to be reinstated as CCHL commissioner. It's desparate times in the CCHL.