Enter The Dragon

It was less than a year ago that the fateful voyage of the Duke of Lancaster met it's watery demise in the middle of the Atlantic. Now, the members of Thursday Night Hockey who survived the ordeal are going to test their fate again. On july 18th the NAHL will sponsor two boats to race in the first annual Dragon Boat Race on the Merrimack River. The league decided that they should go with the league's best and so it will be Blue and Green battling for bragging rights along the mighty Merrimack. "I will whip the men into shape in the next few weeks", said Mee Fung Yoo Lon Tiem a.k.a "The Karate Queen" who was hired by the NAHL to ready teams Blue and Green for the grueling event. "What could possibly go wrong?", said Gary "Toe" Blake. If we could survive the sinking of "The Duke" then we can survive along the Merrimack. "I don't know if I am ready to go back on the water", said Phil "The Commish" Stuart (this year's league MVP). "I have trouble sleeping at night. I wake up from nightmares that I am drowning in White's Park Pond", he lamented. The Commish and many others will work as volunteers along the banks of the Merrimack for the race. " I was o.k. with climbing Mt. Washington", said Tom "Berg" Bergault, "but, I don't think I can go back in the water ever again." The Mt. Washington climb has been rescheduled for a future date in order to make time for the dragon boat race. We look forward to seeing players, coaches and fans down along the banks of the Merrimack on July 18th. "I don't know if this will decide game eight, but, it certainly will set the tone for it", said Todd "Philby" Philbrick. "The entire city is anxiously awaiting game eight", said city mayor Jim Bouley. "I don't know about you, but, ICW4G8!

The Vic Pick

HOLY POND ICE BATMAN!

The stars came out to shine last night at The Gaslighter for the second annual Thursday Night Hockey Awards. Following the success of last year's event which raises money for Hockey Fights Obesity, this year's award ceremony and dinner not only reached it's goal of fundraising, it surpassed it. Hosted by funny man Slappy White and a musical performance by the Black Ice Peas, the event was a crowd pleaser. Finally came the moment that everyone had been waiting for; the presentation of "The Vic" Stanfield Award for the MVP. To no one's surprise, the unanimous choice for this year's award was none other than "THE COMMISH" Phil Staurt. "He did it all for us, game in and game out", said Tom "Shemp" Champagne. "He is the main reason that Blue made it back to the finals", added Tom "Painch" Painchaud. The first runner-up in voting for the award went to Jeff "Cano" Cain and third in votes was Brian "Tilly" Tillotson. "They all had tremendous seasons", said Dan "Lucky" Luker. The other awards handed out last night were: "The Swoop"-Most Goals: Tom "Philby" Philbrick, 2.Kurt "Kaiser" Gillies 3. Mike "Cummy" Commerford. "The Pike" Colgan- Most Assists: Todd "Philby" Philbrick, 2. Dave "JP" Palisi,3. Clint "Eastwood" Casavaugh. "The Leebo"- Most Points: Joe "Joe" Farrelly, 2. Gregg "Moose" Moffet, 3. Chris "Brownie" Brown. "The Hugger"- Best Defenseman: Dunc "Coach" Walsh, 2.Jack "Jackhammer" Fraiser, 3. George "Dumpin" Chase. "The Stuffy"- Best Goalie: Tom "Harry" Harrison, 2. Kenny "Don't Ya Love Em Madly" Bradley. 3. Andy "Gump" Doherty. "The Dunny"- Best Plus/Minus: Jim "Heathy" Heath. "The Lady Bung" -Sportsmanship: Ryan "Silky" Brandt. "The Phonzie" - Black Ice MVP: Andy "BTO" Bachmann. "The Bud" - Coach of the Year: Gary "Toe" Blake. "The Red Onion"- Best Referee: Phil "The Whistle" Lacasse. "The Larry Flint" - Hustler: Dan "Too Late" Early. "The Dick Pinch" - Fun in the Shower: Greg "Hernia" Fournier. "The Murph"- 7th Player: Tom "TC" Carroll. "The Tattahead"- 8th Player: Dave "Tilly" Tillotson. "The Garbo"- Best Rookie: Dave "Motor" Carlson. "The Goofy" -Best Brother Act: The "Tilly" Brothers. "The Tara" - Most Improved: Tom "Berg" Bergault. "The Po" - Comeback Player of the Year: Jim "Cummy" Commerford. "Cummy" received the biggest ovation of the night when it was announced he won "The Po". After suffering a viscous hit that left him hospitalized for two months, Cummy came back to lead Green into the finals. It was inspirational to say the least. The players took the time to pose with fans for photographs and sign autographs. Congratulations to the award winners AND to the NAHL for a fantastic year. I don't know about you BUT, I can't wait for game eight!

Beaver Four Play

Cimmo wins the Friends of Concord High Hockey Golf Outing on the final hole. The victory earned Cimmo the Crimson Jacket which had been hanging in Tilly's closet for the past three years. Despite Tilly's new haircut (see photo), Cimmo was able to dethrone the former champ by erasing a deficit on the eighteenth green. "Tilly had a knack for erasing a deficit on the eighteenth and I figured the only way to beat him was to take his eraser". The event raised over one billion Grecian Euros* which is a record for the tournament. Although Lord's Stanley's Cup did not make an appearance, Hobey's Stick was on hand. Tom "Shemp" Champagne and Dan "Lucky" Luker of the Turkey Pond Flyers laid the lumber on Cheers Chief's Phil "Commish" Stewart and Tom "Duster" Dustin. On the tenth tee Steve Arndt ran out from the woods and knocked the Commish over the tee box. "Despite the hit laid on the Commish, the event was a huge success", said Dunc "Coach" Walsh. "It pales in comparison to the Friends of Thursday Night Hockey Golf Outing (scheduled for later this year), but it's way better than the Brian Boitano Golf Classic which raises money for Bow High School Hockey." Speaking of Thursday Night Hockey; the next installment of The Pucking Files will be dedicated to the Thursday Night Hockey Annual Awards Banquet at the Gas Lighter. Find out who is this year's MVP as well as all the other winners. Also, the NAHL announced that players from both Blue and Green will be participating in a hike up Mt. Washington this summer to raise awareness for "Hockey Fights Obesity". We will be covering that historic climb. There is plenty to look forward to in The Pucking Files this summer. *note:Ten thousand Grecian Euros will typically buy one a chee burger and a Coke. (Correction:Pepsi, no Coke).

Big Swing

Get ready for the annual Friends of Concord High Hockey golf tournament. Players loosen up before the big event that typically raises close to one million euros each year. Tiger Woods is one of the names that will not be participating this year. However, the event is expecting to find Dustin Brown of the LA Kings teeing off at "The Beav". He will be partnered with Jerry Mathers(the original Beav) and other Hollywood freaks. Brown recalls his days in NH fondly when he played for the Monarchs. " I remember playing for the Monarchs", he said. Do you really Dustin? So come on out and support this wonderful event next friday june 22nd. Many stars from the NAHL will be on hand. The money goes to support the CHS hockey team as well as the wonderful work done by the charity Hockey Fights Obesity. We hope to see you there!

Lick My Cup

It's June and that means that someone is going to go down on Lord Stanley this month. Unfortunately it is not going to be the Bruins. We all know that Harry Smellnose picked the LA "Queens" to be eliminated in the first round by the Canucks, in a sweep none the less. The team is full of former Manchester Monarchs. The only Manchester Blackhawk to crack the King's lineup this season is Ray Champagne. I'm not sure if Marty Broduer's Devils are ready to surrender to the Queens just yet. In other related stories; The Nashville Predators parted ways with Alexander Rudulov after his "late night out". He has signed a one year deal with Green in the NAHL. "We think he'll be a perfect fit for our club", said Gary "Toe" Blake. "What do you think he'll bring to this team?" "Bud Light!", answered Toe. Speaking of beer, Patrick Kane was in the news last week after his trip to the Capitol City where he met with team Blue about a possible jump to the NAHL. He said, " I liked the Barley House, but I loved Cheers!" A spokesperson for Blue said, "Pat's a good kid, but the Blackhawks want too much in exchange". It is reported that Blackhawk GM Stan Bowman was asking for "The Kaiser" and "Dumpin Chase" as well as a third round pick.

In other news; Chris "Brownie" Brown was honored for his service to the city of Concord. His was given the "Pineapple Award" for leading the Concord Budmen to the Black Ice Championship. In the semi-finals Brownie scored two goals and added two assists as well as registering six blocked shots and fourteen uncalled hooks. In the finals he scored a goal to go along with three assists, two blocked shots and nine uncalled trips. The Budmen defeated the Avalanche who were without Joe Sakic and Peter Forsberg. Said Concord Mayor Jim Boulay, "Anytime you beat Manchester in anything, we will give you an award." Coming up on June 22nd is the annual Friends of Concord High Hockey Golf Outing. Many of Thursday Night's finest will be on hand. Jimmy the Geek has predicted that "Tilly" will get the lowest score of the tournament. "It's a given", said Geek, "Tilly ALWAYS has the best score, not matter what". The Capitol City is bracing itself for the HUGE influx of people expected to attend this weekend's BOOK SHOW at the Everett Arena. "It is always a mega attraction", said Mayor Boulay and we expect this year to be no different. Jim Zelmo will be there to sign copies of his new book titled, "Trying to Remember the Harvest". I think it is a book about golf, but it might be about farming. I can't remember either. Enjoy the Book Show!

Cat Scratch Fever Infects The Doug

Thousands of cat lovers invaded the Capitol City yesterday for the eighth annual Cat Show. Thursday Night Hockey teamed up with Pussy Galore (a feline charity group) to raise money for the Feline Rescue League of America which provides shelter and food for stray and abandoned cats. This year's representative for Thursday Night Hockey, Mark Rudz told The Pucking Files, "Thursday Night Hockey is a huge supporter of Pussy Galore and the many wonderful things they have done for cats over the years. When Pussy Galore came to TNH and asked if we could lend our support to their cause, it was a no brainer". Irene Katz a spokesperson for Pussy Galore said, "It is no secret that Thursday Night Hockey has raised millions for their charity "Hockey Fights Obesity", so we figured, who better to lend their name to our cause?" Katz told us, "Since partnering with TNH our fundraising has doubled". If you would like to donate to the Feline Rescue League of America then call 603 661-0357 and tell them that you would like to support Pussy. They accept all major credit cards.

Rudz told The Pucking Files, " The show was fantastic! I never knew how much fun you can have in a hockey rink full of cats. I met some of the most amazing people. Some of these cats are so so smart! Some of these cat people are just precious. It is the most fun I have had since game 7 of the NAHL finals. If a picture is worth a thousands words then these photos taken by our award winning photographers speak volumes of the joy that infested The Doug yesterday".

The highlight of the weekend's events was when they awarded the ribbons for "Best of Show" in three different breed catagories. There was a huge thunderous ovation that sent many of the cats running for cover. "One little fella was so startled by the applause that he leaped straight up in the air and clung to the jumbotron scoreboard. The Concord Fire Department had to be called in to get the frightened feline down. Other than that, it went purr-fectly", Rudz concluded. Here our our three winners:

Bruins Have Edge in Game 7 Experience

Wednesday night is just one more game seven for the Beantown Bears. They found a way three times last season to get a W in game sevens. B's fans hope they can do it again. The bad news for the Washington Caps is that The Minister of Defense will not be suited up for the game. Rod Langway is a healthy scratch after to failing to register a point in this series.

The Bruins will be without the services of Dit Clapper. Clap on, clap off, Dit Clapper. It has been a long time since Dit got his clap on, but Tyler Seguin apparently got his clamped on in high school.

Dit, dit, dit, dit, datz all folks!