Sultan of Salt

A health warning was issued in the NAHL today by league President Paul "Pop" Gozaweizle alerting players and fans to the dangers of salt intake. Wednesday's Black Ice Pond Hockey Kickoff Ceremony (see photo)was a salt-laden affair that sent many players from the NAHL to the ER for dehydration and other salt related disorders. The impact was felt last night as Blue and Green faced off at "The Doug" with shortened benches. Rumors swirled around the locker room before the game that veteran defenseman Joe "Joe" Farrelly had become a fatal statistic in the war on salt. Following the game Farrelly was reached by phone and told The Pucking Files, "Rumors of my demise have been greatly exaggerated and I am resting comfortably in Concord Hospital under the nurse's care and I expect a full recovery in time for the Black Ice Pond Hockey Championship". It was a lesson learned for all players and fans that salt should not be taken lightly (or it should).

Both coaches made adjustments to their line-ups to start the game. Jim "The Big Cum" Commerford started off the scoring for Green, but Blue answered right away to even the score. Both goaltenders were outstanding which earned them second and third star honors. Andy "Gump" Doherty made 62 saves for Blue and Kenny "Rebel Without a Rebound" Dean registered 59 saves for Green. Tom "Shemp" Champagne added to his league leading goal scoring production with a boomer from the point that found it's way past Doherty to tie the score at two just before the end of the second. Mark Rudz had numerous opportunities to give Green the lead, but he failed to score on nine breakaways as well as missing two tap-in putts on the 7th and 13th holes. In the third period Dan "Too Late Early" found his mojo and beat Dean to give Blue a lead on a controversial "missed off-sides" call by Phil "The Whistle Lacasse. Green answered minutes later as Phil "Commish" Stuart scored on a rebound to even the score at three. With under two minutes to play in regulation Blue's Clint "Eastwood" Casavaugh fired the rubber past Dean and it looked like Blue would skate away with the victory. Green coach Gary "Toe" Blake pulled Dean with a minute to go in favor of an extra attacker and with the clock ticking down to the final second, Jim "The Big Cum" Commerford snapped the puck past "Gump" Doherty to secure a tie which left both teams tied for first in the Eastern conference heading into the All Star break. Cummy's two goal performance earned him the first star of the game honors and moved him into second place in the scoring race. . The player's did not hang around the locker room after the game to answer questions for reporters. After receiving a picture message (see photo below) from Joe "Joe" Farrelly from his hospital room, players from both teams rushed up to Concord Hospital to be with their fallen comrade.

In other games in the NAHL last night, Mauve beat Yellow 6 to 4. Matt Niskanen had a goal and three assists for Mauve while James Van Riemsdyke had a pair of goals for Yellow. Out on the west coast, Chrome let a three goal lead get away as Rust rallied to earn the victory. The win moved Rust into a tie with Magenta for first in the Western Conference. In case you were wondering why you didn't see overtime last night in the NAHL; it is because "Proposition 99" has been suspended after a ruling form the Federal Court has deemed it "Unconstitutional" and it will have to be reintroduced by law makers in a referendum at the end of the year. In the on going investigation into Hassan Bin Sober's ties to high ranking goverment officials, a new twist in the case it is alledged that Bin Sober may be named as an accomplice in the case that derailed former CIA director David Petraues. Hassan Bin Sober is reported to have set up Petraues with a former girlfriend and spy. More information is expected to surface in the next few weeks. For now anyway.......It's back to the salt mine.