Tilly 5 - Philby 4

The polls had Tilly with a slight lead over Philby going into the 3rd period of last night's contest at The Doug between Green and Blue. It looked like a collection of Blue states and Green states, but in truth, it was the Granite State. Referee Phil "The Whistle" Lacasse was saying that it was too close to call. Green had a five to four lead over Blue when Lacasse dropped the puck to begin the third period. It was the Tilly & Philby show to that point with both players registering all nine goals of the evening. "He was playing with a swagger and a smile", said Bryan "The Big Till" Tillotson of his younger brother Dave. "Philby was a man on a mission", said Dunc "Coach" Walsh about his center. It looked as if it was going to be a long night because on tuesday night the American people overwhelmingly voted YES to Propostion 99 which called for a five minute sudden-death overtime to settle tie games in the NAHL. However, this night would not need to enact Prop 99 because league leading scorer Tom "Shemp" Champagne decided to join the Tilly ticket and pitch in a couple of goals of his own (although they were assisted by Tilly). This combined with goals by Jim "The Big Cum" Commerford, Dave "Motor" Carlson and Tom "TC" Carroll (no relation to "Badger") gave Green a 10 to 5 victory over Blue. Dunc "Coach" Walsh scored the other goal for Blue. The P.A. announcer Steve "Po" Potozak announced "Tilly" as the number one star of the game and the partisan Green crowd began to chant, "FOUR MORE GOALS!" In the locker room "Tilly" told reporters, " This was a glorious night, but I couldn't have done it alone. We'll, maybe I could have, but I didn't. It was a team effort and I couldn't be prouder of these guys. We have a lot of work ahead of us before we can claim the NAHL Championship stick this season." Meanwhile, in a somber Blue locker room, Philby addressed his disappointed teammates. "Ef them and Ef Tilly!", he exclaimed. He told reporters, " I want to offer my congratulations to Tilly and Team Green. I pray that it doesn't go to their heads, especially to Tilly's head because that old Joffa helmet has no room for expansion." Tilly's performance has pulled him to within just three points of the scoring lead that is held by Tom "Shemp" Champagne. Philby moved into third place in the scoring race, one point ahead of Jim "The Big Cum" Commerford and Tom "TC" Carroll. Phil "The Commish" Stuart was held scoreless last night and dropped to 44th place in the scoring race. "You can't take a night off in this league", he explained. I guess I'd better cancel my diplomatic trip to Aruba next week and try to keep myself from falling off the goal scorer's fiscal cliff. Philby was named the second star of the game and the third star went to Dan "Too Late" Early who has now replaced "TC" as the last player to step on the ice each week. "I realized that warm-ups aren't all they're cracked up to be. I don't need no stinkin warm-ups". In other news, just twenty four hours after being elected as the next governor of NH, Maggie Hassan has had to answer questions about her relationship to Hassan Bin Sobar the radical terrorist who was a prime suspect in the attempted assassination of Chris "Brownie" Brown at the inaugural Black Ice Pond Hockey Championship. Ms. Hassan admits that she was once married to Bin Sobar and the reason she didn't pay real estate taxes was that she lived at the Gilmore St. mosque and the mosque is excluded from paying a real estate tax. She cited Bin Sobar's drinking and womanizing as her reasons for leaving him. She told reporters that she was unaware of Hassan Bin Sobar's connection to terrorism. "We can only hope that she is telling the truth", said Ovid Lamontagne. "The last thing this state needs is a governor with ties to terrorism", he added. The Pucking Files has vowed to investigate this story. In the meantime, let's just enjoy Green's victory.